Because I just had lunch, and was in a moderate amount of discomfort, I decided to participate while expressing my very real feelings.
This is the result. Enjoy.
I Just ate Indian food for the first time. It Feels like my stomach is a cement mixer. Like someone prepped the inside of my nose for wallpaper. Like I drank some experimental rocket fuel. Like my insides were replaced by a pile of samosas. Like my tongue is in the hair club for men. Like I’m the guinea pig for a new line of curry flavored body wash. Like oh God, the cement is hardening. Like the sobbing after a bad high school breakup ended only a moment ago. Like the sulphurous depths of a very real Christian hell annexed a part of my esophagus. Like… like I’m full.
Send help.
I want to quote your little ten ways paragraph thingie and say 'this is my favorite part.' When I'm not all braindumb, I'm a gonna try this too. Fantastic.
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