Because I just had lunch, and was in a moderate amount of discomfort, I decided to participate while expressing my very real feelings.
This is the result. Enjoy.
I Just ate Indian food for the first time. It Feels like my stomach is a cement mixer. Like someone prepped the inside of my nose for wallpaper. Like I drank some experimental rocket fuel. Like my insides were replaced by a pile of samosas. Like my tongue is in the hair club for men. Like I’m the guinea pig for a new line of curry flavored body wash. Like oh God, the cement is hardening. Like the sobbing after a bad high school breakup ended only a moment ago. Like the sulphurous depths of a very real Christian hell annexed a part of my esophagus. Like… like I’m full.